read it here on thought catalog.
gratitude.
the weather has been perfect this week. we won’t have it much longer, so i’ve been walking everywhere. on my 50 block walk home tonight, i got that feeling that so often affects me in this city. my chest swelled full, like it was going to burst, because i felt so lucky to live here.
i passed people, made eye contact and smiled, then laughed, remembering how someone told me when i was growing up in north carolina that if i ever came to new york, not to look anyone in the eye, because they would scream at you, “what are you looking at? take a picture, it lasts longer!“
i love to make eye contact and see how it goes. some people are shy, some stare back so boldly that they make me shy, some meet my gaze at just the right level and we have a brief, nice moment together. then they’re gone, and i’m stuck behind someone creeping along at a snail’s pace, or i’m being clipped by the edge of an umbrella, or hopping over a trash bag, or avoiding a delivery man on a bike.
life is hard. life is good. life is sad. life is funny.
no matter what, my life is in new york, and for that, i am so grateful.
the picture above spoke to me, oddly. i was surprised that it did, but i couldn’t stop staring at it. i suppose that sometimes i am as delicate as one of those eggs, and sometimes i’m like that sturdy little love bug, zipping around, making my way in the world. they seem to work together in this image. maybe it appeals to the gemini in me.
i’ve been surprised with quite a few blessings recently, both in my personal and professional life.
i need to focus completely on these opportunities.
i won’t be blogging anymore.
much appreciation to everyone who came here to read my piddly little ramblings, and to those who have been reading all the way back since my first blog.
i wish the best for you all.
i hope that you wake up everyday feeling joy about the moments to come.
i hope that you do something regularly, no matter how small you may think it is, to keep your creative spirit alive and well.
i hope that you treat others with kindness, and that they treat you with kindness in return.
if they don’t, and sometimes they absolutely won’t, i hope you realize that some people are just, quite simply, assholes.
forgive them, move on, and find good people to love who will love you right back.
i hope that your life is filled with laughter and music.
white
i hope that you always have what you need,
and on very special days,
that you get what you want.
white
xo, karyn in ny
smile on your face.
i was out all weekend, so we’ll have music video monday instead of sunday.
this goes out to calvin, a particularly passionate coldplay fan whose karaoke stylings make him virtually indistinguishable from chris martin.
blegh.
the other night, i heard someone storm up the stairs in my hallway and bang on my neighbor’s door. then i heard a man’s voice say things like, get your ass out here, put some clothes on and come out and talk to me like a man. stay away from my son, you hear me? you’re as old as i am, this is disgusting. his mother and i are telling you only once, you stay away from him. send him out to me right this second.
i stepped out in the hallway and enquired as to if i should phone the police.
the angry man said, i’m here to collect my son, just as my neighbor’s door opened and a boy of about 16 exited.
my neighbor is at least 60.
i’m living next door to a creep.
today, i read the grand jury findings on the sandusky case. it retold the stories of all eight of his young victims (that we know of now; we’ll likely learn of more as time goes on).
i thought of his wife, and how she had to know what was going on – when your husband sneaks down to the basement in the middle of the night where a young boy is sleeping, there’s no way you don’t know.
i thought of joe paterno, who i don’t know or know of; i don’t follow college sports unless it’s carolina. yes, technically he can say he did the right thing, but there was no follow-up, and he seemed, as the others who knew did, just relieved that it hadn’t become a scandal.
happy to let sleeping dogs lie.
greed, selfishness, complacency, the feeling that your life is too valuable to risk an upheaval…yeah, so some poor kid was getting raped in the shower of your school, ultimately, you’ve got a game to win!
how could all of those people who knew what sandusky was up to continue to pat him on the back, shake his hand, and work with him on a daily basis?
sometimes, it seems no matter how you look at it, people are assholes.
mutability.
lately all i eat at home is a bowl full of arugula, tossed with kosher salt, fresh pepper, olive oil, and balsamic vinegar. sometimes with ricotta or an heirloom tomato thrown in. tonight i added prosciutto.
life moves in chunks of weeks, patterns, playlists, meals. when i find a restaurant i like, i find myself there once a week. listening to the same album on the walk there. carrying the same purse as last week, wearing the same sweater. not because i don’t have others, but because any bit of familiarity is comforting in a world of change.
then that change comes along; a move, a different job, a season shift, the beginning of a relationship – or the end of one. the globe tilts me a smidge north or south, and i start foraging again for new habits, new routines, new adventures. switch iced coffee for hot. sleep on the left side instead of the right. stop eating salad and start eating cereal. never again wear those shoes that i wore for two months straight.
i loved choose your own adventure books when i was a kid. you could read them five or six times and end up with a different result just by choosing one different page at some point in the story. one tiny decision affects the overall outcome in a major way.
it’s the butterfly effect. and i’m flapping my wings.
freckles.
i haven’t written a lot for thought catalog lately. the reason for that is twofold; one, i haven’t had much to say that’s funny, and i like to publish funny articles there. two, the comments make me squeamish. i feel like some of the commenters take me too seriously and literally. it makes me feel defensive, and then it makes me think maybe i shouldn’t write anything at all.
anyway, here’s a piece about having freckles that, if you knew me, you would you know is meant to be light, not whiny.
i mean, i finished it with a hamster story, people.
but whatever. haters gonna hate. that’s the glory of the internet, i suppose.
work it.
opportunity is missed by most people because it comes dressed in overalls and looks like work.
- thomas edison
how to make it.
have you seen “how to make it in america”?
i’m obsessed.
it’s in its second season on hbo.
reasons i love it:
-kid cudi. so much swag.
-lake bell. i worked with her on what happens in vegas. she’s great. i’m happy for her success.
-bryan greenberg. he was in a docu-style show about actors trying to make it in 2005 called “unscripted”. i love seeing actors from those types of shows actually become actors, ala jeremy renner from “the it factor”.
-luiz gusman. need i say more?
the show is well-written, well-directed, and well-acted.
it takes place in my favorite city.
also, the intro and theme song complete me.
can’t wait for them to add the storyline about the redheaded freckle faced blogger chick from the west village.
